Posts Tagged ‘Life Coach’

Sexing Up My Life!

Monday, February 15th, 2010

In the crowded lift (elevator) descending from our meeting on 21st Century Issues at the London School of Economics, Chris and I formally introduced ourselves – and then headed to a bar.

Before I continue, I must point out that, in reality, there was a third person in the lift, who came with us.  But he got purged as I tapped away on my computer!  In fact, my book isn’t strictly a true story – and it isn’t completely a work of fiction.  It’s faction!  I’ve played with my own life like some kind of superhuman force – and made it “sexier”, more effective.  Wouldn’t it be nice if it were always that easy?

I removed my friend Robert from the picture (sorry Robert), so that Chris and I could carry on a conversation which quickly got down to the self-transformation point of the book, novel, work of faction.  In fact, Lost and Found in London weaves constantly between what actually happened and what makes for a gripping story.  Because of this, I now have a greater appreciation of the creative process!

Once we were seated in a dark corner (not true), I began to fill Chris in on my latest ups and downs in life – mainly downs.  The home I’d had in the lovely North London village of Hampstead had been sold, forcing me to leave any day.  And, of course, U.K. immigration authorities had put a time limit on my stay.

“My London world is falling down around me,” I confided.  “I don’t want to go back to Canada and have no idea what I will do when I get there … I guess I’m a lost soul at this point in my life.  Not something to be proud of.”

Chris tapped his wine glass against mine.  More to come …

“Rating” Men (Human Beings Actually)

Wednesday, February 10th, 2010

Chris, the man who became my Life Coach, and I met at a meeting on 21st Century Issues held one evening at the London School of Economics.  In other words, something substantial brought us together – as friends.  It wasn’t just lust across a crowded room!

Years ago, I lived with a charming, fun-loving man I met at the Parliamentary Press Club in Ottawa, Canada.  Our inebriated attraction was instant.  People around us commented on it.  A couple of days later – yes, just a couple – he moved in.  After that, he loved to recount how, on our first encounter, he was “a face on the barroom floor.”  Although it was great fun at first, the relationship was a disaster!

I tell this to explain why my meeting with Chris boded much better.  We first interacted when he chaired a workshop on war and peace.  We were both very much anti-war – and the hideous death and destruction it causes.  It wasn’t a terribly romantic venue, but it meant that we knew exactly where we each stood on a very key issue facing the world.  Once you have something that fundamental in common, there are fewer surprises.

In fact, I have an informal list in my head of men (people) I have little use for – and it’s quite extensive!  Men who promote war, rather than negotiate peace; men who support the genetic modification of plants, animals, and humans without seriously looking at the consequences (The Biotech Century by Jeremy Rifkin); men who aren’t interested in renewable energy and would rather see nuclear plants and waste spread around the globe; men who unsustainably mine, log, and fish (plunder) our finite natural resources.  And that’s just a beginning, a taste!  Sadly, the list grows as I learn more about the planet’s problems. 

When Chris and I ended up in the same elevator after the LSE meeting, I knew that, whatever else I might find out about him, he had passed a very important first test!

Chance Encounters?

Monday, February 8th, 2010

Once in a while – or more often if you are “lucky” – the right person comes along at exactly the right time.  He or she seems made-to-order!  A gift from who knows where.

This is what happened to me in London, not long after U.K. authorities had given me my marching orders.  I had stayed long enough, they advised me, it would soon be time to go.  I loved London and wanted to remain there – so this news hit me hard.  In fact, I began to sound a bit like my namesake Scarlett O’Hara at the end of the film Gone with the Wind: “Where will I go?  What will I do?”  Then, Chris came along. 

After hearing my tale of woe, he offered to help me deal as productively as possible with my situation.  He told me he had professional training in Direction Finding Techniques and something intriguing called Sub-Personality Management.  He invited me to take temporary refuge in his Wimbledon home, which he called The Railway Tracks Hotel, where he would put me through a series of exercises designed to give me a better sense of myself and my future – before going into “exile”.  I accepted!

I had the same right-person, right-time experience recently while flying from Toronto, Canada, to Cozumel, Mexico.  With the help of my brilliant web “master” Bruce Buttimore, I had just launched my website and was thinking of starting a blog to introduce my Chris-inspired book “Lost and Found in London:  How the Railway Tracks Hotel Changed Me”.  Somehow, the perfect person, Saskia Winjgaard, was sitting beside me on the plane.  There, 6 or 7 miles above the earth, she offered me – a complete stranger – her help and support on my blog project, once we returned to our normal lives.  Again, I accepted – and you are reading the result!  

Some people describe such serendipitous meetings as “the universe providing”.  They claim that I sent positive energy vibes out and “attracted” exactly who I needed.  Although this sounds like a tempting scenario to believe in, I haven’t decided whether I can entirely.  What I do know is that the best way to experience life and bring interesting, exciting people into it is to be “out there”, taking risks, exuding enthusiasm and a certain amount of positive energy!  You won’t attract anything momentous sitting at home, watching TV.

The Triumphs and Perils of Self-Image

Friday, February 5th, 2010

Self-image is everything!  It speaks volumes.  It controls us and our actions to the nth degree.  There’s no getting around it.  That’s where the problems and solutions lie.

As I wrote in my first two blogs, I want to communicate what I learned about self-transformation – reprogramming that stubborn self-image – while in London, England, a year ago.  I’ve written a book about the experience Lost and Found in London, but also want to get the word out virtually.

When I arrived in London, I was delighted to be there, but was also feeling a little desperate.  My life wasn’t what I wanted it to be – both personally and professionally.  I was frustrated, but had no idea what to do about it.  Somehow things weren’t going as I had hoped, but the cause of my inability to achieve the life I fantasized about was a mystery to me.

Unfortunately, it’s difficult to identify any one root cause of a person’s attitudes and actions.  We are all like giant puzzles with many, many parts, influenced by the various worlds I have mentioned – the worlds of family, friends, community, country, and planet.  Trying to isolate a key piece to explain the whole puzzle is foolish.  There are simply too many elements involved in creating the person you have become.

But there are patterns and clues to what makes us tick – and we should be on the look-out for them.  In terms of self-image, the good news for me is that I have always seen myself as a reasonably slim person – and rarely have weight problems (except when I’ve fallen in love with a good cook!).  That self-image is like an internal guardian – mentally watching the scales!  The bad news is that my stable, up-and-coming, middle-class life was destroyed when my father died at age 31, leaving my 25-year-old mother alone with three children under 5.  That led to a life of instability and relative poverty – and, I believe, greatly affected my self-image.

When I first met Chris, my London Life Coach, our task was to reveal and revise the negative aspects of my self-image.  The ones that were creating my own personal glass ceiling …limiting my life.  More to come …